CounterCulture: Engage with Technology or Embrace Boredom?

Have you ever looked around at other people in a hotel lobby, airport or other public setting?  I’m betting you saw almost everyone engaged with their phones. (And that you had to look up from your own phone to survey the scene in the first place!) So why do we act this way? How does it affect us? And how can we reclaim our attention from those little screens?  Today, we are discussing CounterCulture:  Behaving in ways that are in a different direction than what is dictated by our more mainstream culture.

Why We Can’t Unplug

1. Everybody else is on their phones. Our culture pressures us to maximize productivity. We constantly talk about how busy we are, which creates a perception that we always should be busy. And our phones enable this, whether we are answering emails, responding to text messages or connecting with coworkers or family. But because our brains cannot maintain intense focus for long periods, we also tend to slip away from those “productive” tasks to use our phone for distraction—catching up on the news, watching funny cat videos, doomscrolling. Our culture says this is OK, too. But is it?

2. Humans hate boredom. Some of us will actually self-inflict pain rather than experience boredom: In fact, 67% of men and 25% of women in one study chose to give themselves electric shocks during the time they were instructed to entertain themselves with their own thoughts.
3. We hate hard questions even more. Our default mode network is the part of our brain that turns on when our brain is not otherwise occupied or when we feel bored. For many people, this is terrible! When our mind wanders, our default mode network offers us hard questions: Who am I? Why am I here? Does my life have meaning? Our phones and other technology almost completely ensure that we never have to face the hard questions. But there is a cost. Anxiety and depression have spiked in the years since smartphones became ubiquitous.

So, just to sum up, our culture normalizes relentless productivity and turning to our phones at the first sign of boredom. Busy and distracted, we avoid the hard questions about meaning and significance in our lives. As a result, we’re sad and anxious.

That’s a problem.

But what do we do?

CounterCulture Response: Embrace Boredom  

Be bored more. Invite daydreaming, free from distractions, back into your life. Let your mind wander. We all used to do it when we were younger, before we had smartphones. It’s wired into our brains; we just need to remember how to do it:

1. Start small

Radical change is temporary; incremental change is permanent. At some point today, try to sit without distractions (phone, radio, TV or any other technology that will draw your attention to it) for one minute. During those 60 seconds, just pay attention to where your mind goes. Don’t do anything with it or about it. Just pay attention. That’s it. Then go back to your regular day. Tomorrow, do the same thing, adding one minute. After that, keep going and add one minute every day. In one month, you’ll be up to 30 minutes!  

2. Commute without distraction

If you drive or take mass transit to work, commute without the radio, music or a podcast. Give your mind an opportunity to wander. Let your brain activate the default mode network. Just pay attention. Then continue on with your day as you normally would.

3. Work out your boredom muscle

If you have an exercise routine—and I hope you do!—ditch the earbuds or headphones next time you work out. This creates another space for your mind to be bored. (And don’t try the “loophole” of playing amplified music or videos on your computer or TV.)

What You Get in Return

1. The skills to tolerate, better manage and embrace boredom. Why is that important?  You’ll be less bored at work, less bored in your personal relationships and less bored with everything else in your world.
2. You’ll begin to answer the most important questions in your life: Who am I? Why am I here? Does my life have meaning? And others that will pop up along the way.
3. Who knows? You just might be happier!  

Which of these steps will you implement today?  Please write to us and let us know!

I’d love to hear your questions and comments. If you would like to discuss this topic further, just drop me a note.